As leaders, you’ll often hear authenticity being talked about as an aspirational quality.
You’ll have no doubt read the articles or listened to the podcasts that urge us to “be more human”, “bring our whole selves to work”, or “show more vulnerability”. All different ways of saying we should be more authentic.
But, for me, this idea of authenticity is a real bugbear. I don’t believe it’s actually what people want from their leaders at all.
They are looking for someone to follow, a safe pair of hands to help them through the chaos and overwhelm they may be experiencing around them at work. Someone who they can trust and believe in.
In this blog I’ll explore how authenticity alone can potentially be very dangerous, and actually make people less likely to trust in your leadership skills.
The cult of authenticity
It’s been bubbling for a while, but I feel like it was the pandemic that really catapulted the idea of authenticity to the fore.
When people were forced to show more of their “behind-the-scenes” life, we seized upon this idea that we needed to be more authentic and more relatable in order to be good leaders.
While I totally agree that being more human is no bad thing when it comes to leadership, I really dislike the way that authenticity has become a bit of a byword for behaving however badly you like or completely letting your guard down.
“I’m just being my authentic self ” is an easy statement after you’ve shouted at someone, sworn at someone, disrespected someone, or isolated someone. It’s an easy excuse for behaviour that is not acceptable for those who lead others.
We don’t want our leaders to be authentic, we want them to be genuine, and this is an important distinction.
During research for my new book Nobody Believes You, which is all about becoming a credible leader, we asked people “why do you follow a leader?”. The word authentic came up just once.
What actually matters
I believe what people really need from a leader is credibility, not authenticity, and the two can show up in very different ways.
People want you to actually lead, to help them through chaos, but they can’t do that if you’re showing up like a hot mess, being temperamental or acting in a way that’s unexpected to them.
As I explain in the book, it all comes back to basic human psychology. Our brains are wired in much the same way as they were 50,000 years ago, but the world we live in now is vastly different. We have technology, infrastructure and vast global communities and are connected to a constant barrage of information from all angles.
Amidst all of this, however, our primary function is still just to survive. Our brains like to be able to predict threats and keep us safe – when they can’t do this they become anxious, worried and stressed. They will make up a story to predict what’s going to happen, and this is usually the worst-case scenario.
If someone at work suddenly starts to change their behaviour, it’s hard for people to focus on the work that needs to get done. The state of threat is huge, and the focus for the brain is now all on the reasons for this change, what it means for the future, and trying to predict what’s happening. Things don’t feel safe.
People need to trust someone before they are able to feel confident following them – and credibility is the absolute bedrock of this.
Credible leaders inspire action and passion because people believe in what they say. They know they’re being told the truth, and that their leader will do what they say they’ll do.
What does being a credible leader look like?
Credibility, like any other aspect of leadership, is multi-faceted.
If a leader wants to succeed, they have to look at their behaviours, their communication style, and their ability to build relationships with those they lead.
Whether you want two or 20,000 people to follow you, it isn’t enough to focus on just one thing. Leading is complicated because it involves people, and people are complicated.
I’ve been helping teams solve their workplace communication problems for the last 20 years and I hear the same things over and over again. Leaders complain that they’re struggling to get their employees to do what they need them to do, and they believe the problem is everyone else.
Often, I find that the real problem is a breakdown in communication linked to the behaviour and approach of the leader. In short, leaders think they have a team or culture problem when really what they have is a credibility problem.
In the new book I explore eight key traits that, our research showed, people are looking for in a credible leader:
- Empathy: You believe someone else’s lived experience regardless of your own.
- Trustworthy: You’ve proven your competence, and people act on your words.
- Visionary: You can clearly articulate where you want people to go with you.
- Supportive: You create space for your team to learn and grow.
- Vulnerability: You’re open, real, and able to admit when you’re wrong.
- Likable: People like being around you, regardless of whether they like you.
- Integrity: You do what you say you will do, consistently.
- Capable: You take action and make decisions based on experience.
Most people excel in a few of these, but might be weaker in others. When you’re missing one, you’ll know. You’ll see it in your team and feel it in your culture. It shows up in the form of disconnection and distrust – that no amount of authenticity or “being vulnerable” will change if you haven’t focused on the other elements.
You can read more about each of the eight traits and how to cultivate your credibility as a leader in Nobody Believes You, which is out now and available here.
